Weeding...Weeding...Weeding...Always Weeding

"What is a weed? A plant whose virtues have never been discovered."

- Ralph Waldo Emerson -

          I love being outside and walking around our property.  It's so peaceful, restful and just downright therapeutic...except for the weeds.  God, do I hate weeds.  The husband will literally spend hours each spring planting such beautiful plants and flowers only to have see them over-powered literally overnight with weeds.  Not just any weeds...prickly, deeply rooted, plant sucking WEEDS!

     The husband is a naturalist.  He loves making things grow and so he does...he grows things and they flourish, and the weeds appreciate his efforts.  I go outside to the front of the house and start the extraction process only to find out, I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. "Petunias, oops!  Son of a bitch! Marigolds!!! How the hell did those weeds envelope the petunias??"  The pressure!  I walk inside and tell the husband..."I give up. I simply give up."

     The process of weeding is well, tedious and never-ending. One of the first times I decided to become "one with the Earth," a swarm of hornets decided going up my pant leg was a good idea and I don't think I have jerked and jumped that hard since my disco days.  After that episode, weeding did not become a priority.  A diet tonic and a shot of  vodka was more to the liking. Then something even more definitive happened...

     The husband planted sun flowers.  He planted marigolds.  He planted peppers, tomatoes, cucumbers, and herbs. He planted corn and two willow trees.  Then...he fractured his hip.  The process of trying to maintain this plethora of natural beauties was left to me.  I tried.  I got outside and I took my time.  I gingerly pulled and pulled and pulled some more of those vicious, ugly weeds to free all of the beauty that was indeed flourishing from the husband's efforts. It suddenly became very therapeutic.  One weed, two weed, three weed, gone! There were tossed into the wheelbarrow to become mulch. Ha! Take that weeds! Now, now you're fertilizer!  I was outside for a few days and the pile of weeds continued to grow and as I looked at the mountain of weeds I had plucked, I suddenly realized how therapeutic it all was.

   In short, when we extract the weeds...when we expose the beauty, there is a certain freedom and well, additional growth from the process.  It's not just weeds I've been extracting since, it's the clearing of much more.  When we personally weed, we allow the best of ourselves to grow. Why I didn't realize this until recently, I don't have a clue.  Now I also understand why my husband is the naturalist that he is.  When he grows the bounty that is ours, he is in fact sharing a clear part of himself.  I will never attest to be the naturalist that my husband is. Forget about that. However let me very clear...Weeding...it's a calling. It is for the brave who take it upon themselves to clear their space and provide room for what is beautiful.  

The hand we're dealt...

"Sometimes when people are under stress, they hate to think, and it's the time when they most need to think. "  - William J. Clinton

      It's been quite the challenge these last five years.  Today, I have been reflecting on so many people in my life and how they have handled the cards they have been dealt and let's face it...the cards in their hand have definitively put their lives in a terrible place with the solutions very difficult to find.  I watched so many people that I love and deeply care for go through tragedies that would make the most of us give up the fight of living  and I wonder how they have managed to put one foot ahead of the other and come out the darkest of times, although changed, but stronger and but tired, very, very, tired.

     I have never handled the stresses of my private life well but lately what I have come to terms with is that I can get up and I can face my day and find some strength in giving my energy and my time to others.  What I am trying to understand however, is how we come through the hardest of times and manage to laugh, to seek out our friends and our family.  Why don't we all just hide? The answer I have come to realize is stubbornness.  Some of us are simply more stubborn than others and we simply don't give in to what we have faced.  It also my observation that when we have good stubborn people around us, that this also gives us some salvation. 

     Some people have a strong faith which they practice faithfully.  That seems to be one way. Some people's answer is volunteer or create a movement to bring awareness to whatever tragedy has come their way. Others suffer and grieve for an extended time and then venture out and begin their lives again.  There are those who pick up and relocate.  They change everything and leave their roots behind which considering there is tremendous world out there doesn't seem to be the worst idea as long as they are running to something rather than running away.  Having a passion has also proven to be a vary important necessity when faced with human tragedy or challenge.  Social media can be an asset for encouragement or providing reminders that "This too shall pass," But this is superficial.  We need people, good people around us.  People who understand us and will love us regardless of the fact that we indeed have fallen apart and need to put our personal puzzle back together. 

     The hurdles and tragedies all human beings face seem to come when we're not looking.  I have been in that place where I was waiting for "the next shoe to drop," only to realize that no matter how much anxiety I was experiencing, the shoe was going to drop any way.  Life has a certain level of grief.  The question we need to ask ourselves is, will we let those incidents make us turn our backs on all of what life has already given us?  The answer seems to vary depending on the person but more inherently is that we always have "choice." We make a choice as to how we're going to continue looking at the world. We find out who is with us for the long haul and who is not.  We need to love those who walk away because we can be very sure they are facing their own challenges.

     Giving of our time, our energy and our love seems to be the only way out of the darkest of times. If we can put one foot in front of the other...if we can be smart enough to put our trust in the right people, then we win. It's true that we all learn the hard way.  There is no easy way really.  But I am very sure these days, that overcoming adversity means familiarity with those who have been continually successful by simply being who they are and not hiding a thing.